


One Last Time

by starrynightwrt



Category: Bumilangit Cinematic Universe
Genre: Be grateful im not killing anyone in this one, M/M, its a good thing to finally get this off my chest, this been haunting me for a while
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-27
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2021-01-04 09:31:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21195458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrynightwrt/pseuds/starrynightwrt
Summary: “After everything that you’ve put me through, you don’t get to miss me. Four months; no text, no call, no hint whatsoever on where ever the hell you are. Then you think you can just show up here unannounced just because you miss me?!”





	One Last Time

**It was almost midnight when the meeting finally came to an end.**

Ganda Hamdan purposefully lingered behind, he wasn’t necessarily in a mood to mingle with the others as they make their way to their own respective offices. He sighed, trying to slightly relieve the growing tension on his shoulder. He’d been sitting for six hours straight, his joints had started to lock themselves in the most uncomfortable way. Ganda checked his phone; nothing, no notifications, no messages, no alerts. Just a digital clock and tomorrow’s weather forecast shown on display. Just as usual.

Ganda eventually got up from his seat not long after, he slid his phone into his pants pocket, and grabbed the thick folders that had been sitting in front of him the entire night; he was the last one to leave. He dragged his steps along the dimly-lighted hallway slowly, not at all happy with the fact that he needed to go back home. It had been four months, in all honesty Ganda had tried to adapt with his fairly new routines, but it didn’t mean that he already make peace with it. He had been drowning himself in work for the past couple of months as a way to escape his messy truth, finding comfort in his office just to avoid the emptiness of his own home.

His weary steps paused for a split second when he realized something was off with his office at the end of the hallway before picking up the pace. Something was off; he made sure to turn the lights off and closed the door before leaving for the long overdue meeting, but right now, it wasn’t the case at all. 

He felt his stomach dropped an inch when he realized who was in his room, standing with his back facing the door, observing the city skyline from the window; “Ghani?”

Ghazul was caught off guard, he flinched slightly on Ganda’s sudden calling, before turning around to face him; he looked nervous, and Ghani Zulham never look nervous. “Your assistant told me to wait inside since it took you so long,” he explained, “I hope that’s okay?”

“What are you doing here?” Ganda asked, immediately dismissing Ghazul’s question.

“Frankly, I don’t know,” Ghazul made his way closer, but Ganda shot him a look, establishing a clear boundary, “I miss you.”

Ganda chuckled, not at all fazed with Ghazul’s sudden honesty. He made his way to the leather sofa in the corner of the room, throwing an unpleasant gaze at the other man, “you miss me,” repeated in such sarcastic amusement, “so you come here to see me?”

Ghazul simply nodded, knitting a soft smile on his lips.

“You don’t get to miss me, Ghani.”

Ghazul looked up, some part of him still wouldn’t dare to meet Ganda’s eyes. “I’m sorry?”

“After everything that you’ve put me through, you don’t get to miss me.” Ganda didn’t think he had it in him to be this assertive. He couldn’t lie to himself, a huge part of him was relieved to find Ghazul alive and well in his office, but he knew all too well not to let the moment consumed him. He needed to set some boundaries, a defense, to protect himself. “Four months; no text, no call, no hint whatsoever on where ever the hell you are. Then you think you can just show up here unannounced just because you miss me?!” 

The room fell silent. Ghazul couldn’t think of anything to answer. 

“You had put me through hell, Ghani Zulham. I was terrified for days; I was scared that I might wake up and find your name on a headline said found dead in a ditch somewhere. I was scared that I might find your picture in an obituary at the back of a newspaper. I was so scared that it almost felt like leaving without you wasn’t even an option.”

Then it dawned on him. Ghazul had never taken any action on a whim. Every single decision that he made was meticulously calculated by weighing on its consequences and outcomes. Or so he thought. This time, he really didn’t think that the implications of his action would bring Ganda so much pain. It took him everything he had in him to not run across the room and just wrapped his arms around Ganda. He whispered; “I’m here now, Ganda. You can stop worrying.”

“Oh _ darling _ , I stopped worrying a long time ago.” Ganda’s tone was cold and defensive, something Ghazul himself never thought he’d heard coming from the man, “After a few weeks, I thought that if you _ are _ in fact _ dead _ , there isn’t much I could do anyway, we’ve said our goodbyes and we ended on a supposedly good terms. That’s just the way it is. And If you aren’t, in which apparently is the case, then why should _ I _ be the only who worries, you don’t seem like you give that much shit about me anyway.”

“But I _ do _ , I care about you a lot. I’m so so sorry for having to make you went through all of that, I really do.” Ghazul felt like he was an inch away from breaking down. He stepped closer, ignoring the invisible boundaries. His whole body ached for Ganda, it was as if Ganda was so far out of his reach despite the fact the he was right there in the corner. Ghazul pleaded; “Ganda, _ please _, I need you.”

“So did I!” Ganda stood up, his blood rushing through in raging trauma, “I needed you, Ghani. And you weren’t there, you were never there. Because, _ you _ broke up with me and _ you _ left me alone in shambles to pick up what’s left. I might have gotten over you but it wasn’t easy at all.”

_ I might have gotten over you. Gotten over you. _

Those three words stuck themselves in the back of Ghazul’s head. Ghazul started questioning his actions, like he wasn’t sure he was supposed to be there in the first place. Was he only bringing Ganda more pain by showing up unannounced? He couldn’t think straight, everything looked hazy, and he was trapped. 

“I didn’t have any other choice,” Ghazul muttered under his breath.

“You _ do!” _ Ganda shouted, he was emotionally drained. He just wanted everything to be over. He was tired of arguing. His tone softened, _ “ _ You do have a choice. You can be with me, you can be happy, we can be happy. And don’t tell me that it’s not that simple because it is. I _ loved _ you Ghani Zulham, even after everything, I was ready to spend the rest of my life with you.”

“I just -- I can’t afford to lose you.”

“And you think _ I _ can?!” Ganda broke down, his voice cracking under pressure. He felt his tears dripping down his cheeks. All of those feelings that he buried had made its way back in a sudden burst of emotions. He started to recall everything. The good and the bad things, all mustered into one cursed memory for him, “ I’ve told you a million times; you are _ not _ gonna lose me. I’m not a child that you need to protect, I know what I signed up for since the first time that I met you. And when I say I'm in, that means I'm in it for the ride, ‘til the very end. But, no, you’re just too damn arrogant to admit that, don’t you? You just got to be the hero of every-”

“He knows, Ganda! Pengkor knows!” Ghazul cut him off, his voice cracking with a scream, no longer caring whether someone is listening or not.

“What?”

“He found out, Ganda. About everything. That’s why I needed to shut everything down. I needed to cut every string that could connect the two of us, I need to cut ties with _ you. _That’s why I didn’t leave you any hint, because I can’t risk him finding out that you are involved with me.”

Ganda no longer had the strength to stood his ground. He fell back to his chair, eyes empty. 

_ He knows. _

Ghazul walked closer, kneeling before Ganda. He leveled his eyes, eventually found the courage to look into Ganda’s “For the past few months I’ve been running from every one of his children. And frankly, im getting tired of it. If he’s gonna kill me, then so be it. But I need to see you, just for one last time.”

Ganda slumped down to the floor before pulling Ghazul into his arms. Every bit him wanted to tell Ghazul that everything is gonna be okay. But, enough lies were told in this building, he wasn’t gonna add another one, not tonight. 

  
  



End file.
